My husband (now my ex) and I had been married for only a few years. We had camped with my husband’s family for the last two summers at the summer campground and they invited us to go camping at the beach with them for a week. It was my first camping trip to the beach with hubby’s family and we would be sharing their camper. True to form we had a memorable trip. Hubby and I arrived after a long 13-hour drive fairly early in the day. We had all day to relax from our drive by soaking up the sun on the warm soft sand.
Lying there in total comfort I listened to the soothing sounds of the ocean. It was well worth the long excruciating drive. My father-in-law knew I liked to fish so he rigged up one of his rods for me and we proceeded to fish. While we were fishing Hubby took a walk on the beach and his mother sat under her umbrella and read a book. To my amazement and joy, the fish were actually biting and we did quite well. My father-in-law took the fish and cleaned them and later we all dined on our fresh catch with my favorite salad and, this would come back to bite us, baked beans. My in-laws were making sure that we were happy and comfortable. We ate, talked and laughed until nightfall. It was a wonderful day and after a long hot shower we decided to turn in.
The sleeping arrangements in this camper were very accommodating. My in-laws had a big bunk in the loft at the back of the camper. Hubby and I used the pull out sofa bed a few feet in front and below them. It was a strange layout, but really kind of neat. At the foot of the big loft-bunk was a little screen window that you could slide open and look out to the rest of the camper. When Hubby and I pulled the sofa bed out and made the bed, our heads would be resting right under the window. Convenient, if you wanted to talk to the people in the loft. However, my in-laws decided to sleep with their feet at the window.
Hubby and I snuggled in. The pullout bed was really quite cozy. I had no trouble drifting off into a restful sleep. I was just at the point between awake and asleep where you feel so good only to be jolted awake by a thunderous, piercing noise known as the revenge of the baked beans! OMG, we are trapped in this little tin can with my father-in-law up there letting them rip. Quick, open a window I’m losing consciousness! I was sure that my mother-in-law, being his bunkmate, had to have been killed by the poisonous gas explosion. I held my head out the window, took a large breath of sweet ocean air and voiced my concern to my husband who was stifling a snicker and told me not to worry about it. Better out than in is his theory. Not from my point of view it isn’t.
Finally, as the smoke cleared I began to drift off to sleep. I was floating off to that peaceful place at the threshold of sleep. All was right with the world again when suddenly, the camper started to shake, the floor was vibrating and I swear the walls where going in and out! I know it’s one of those freak ocean gales blowing up. We’re all going to die!
No, it’s my father-in-law snoring. What an awful noise he’s making. It sounds like a bull moose desperately crying out for the only female moose left on earth. I sense it’s going to be a long sleepless night for me. No wonder my in-laws have separate bedrooms at home. Could it get any worse?
At long last my father-in-law decides to roll over and over and over again. He finally finds a comfortable position, the snoring stops and I wonder if I should dare close my eyes and try to sleep? After lying in silence for what seemed like an hour I decide that it’s safe to go to sleep. Ahh, I sigh as I listen to the ocean waves lulling me into yet another peaceful rest. Remember when I asked if it could get any worse? Well, don’t ask the question …
I hear more rustling and shuffling from the loft and hope against hope that my father-in-law won’t start snoring again or worse, get another gas attack. He doesn’t thank goodness. But he did kick off his boxer shorts. Not only did he kick them off, he kicked them out the little window. Like acid rain from above, they fell down, right on my face!! Arrrgh !!! I screamed bloody murder and carried on like a little kid. “Get it off, get it off, get a hotel room, I’m out of here!”
So wrong on so many levels. Again, all I could do was put my head in my hands and laugh or maybe cry, not sure which! But we all had a good laugh about it in the morning.
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